Some can and some can’t; that’s the way it is…
I remember so clearly the rainy Monday morning when we were given a diagnosis of autism for LS. That was seven years ago…I recall asking the doctor; ‘will LS always have autism?’ Naturally the reply was in the affirmative. I came home and somehow decided to continue trying to study for an exam in children’s literature that I had later that week. I figured if the autism was always going to be there then there would be enough time after my exam to ‘address’ said autism.
Now at the time I was studying the challenges for Eeyore in A.A.Milne’s, Winnie-The-Pooh. Eeyore (the Donkey, reader) was reflecting on the limitations of his make-up to his friend Pooh Bear. Eventually the Donkey surmises:
‘We can’t all, and some of us don’t. That’s all there is to it.’
Gazing out through the window into that rainy Monday I pondered the Donkey’s thoughts. Indeed, some of us can’t and that’s just it; end of discussion. For instance, I thought a paralysed individual cannot walk. A blind individual cannot see. That’s just it. LS has autism. That’s also just it.
However, I pondered further, imagine if I as his mother could get to that place in my mind that truly believes: ‘That’s all there is to it’. Well, wouldn’t that be quite wonderful? For then I would just take LS for the child he is. I would not have to deal with thoughts of: ‘Maybe he might be able to do this?, maybe he might be able to do that?, what caused this to happen? I figured that would be a much better place to be in, in my mind. I would be happier and I felt LS would most certainly be infinitely better off as a result.
I needed to dry my eyes, take a deep breath and acknowledge; acceptance is the key…Only then can we move forward….and so I did learn to accept, in the fullness of time….and then I also did find myself moving forward, in the fullness of time.